Ok, ok, I know. I know I really dropped the ball on that whole Halloween thing. Because you know what? It turns out that when you watch a horror movie every day for a week, things happen like you hear a noise while you are showering with no one else in the house, and then you spend an hour sort of locked in the bathroom waiting for your roommates to come home, just on the off, off, off chance that, I don’t know, maybe that noise was the sound ax murderers make! When they are getting ready to start their ax murdering! you know! Also, I have recently gotten hella sick and then also had some…”personal stuff” that may have made me want to “lie down for days on end watching whatever is on Netflix watch-now and eating an entire thing of Pepperidge Farm Goldfish at a single sitting, but in a really overdramatic and self-pityingly childish way, like not like anyone died or I lost my house or anything.”
Anyway, I *do* want to quickly recommend a bloody but smart horror movie called “Severance”, a mesmerizing 80s pastiche horror movie called “House of the Devil” (though angry horror movie purists like me will get angry over the last few minutes of the film) and an amazing D movie (maybe even an E movie? does that exist?) called “Megashark Vs. Giant Octopus,” which stars a growed-up Debbie Gibson, and also Lorenzo Lamas and a few other guys. Let’s talk more about “Megashark”, shall we?
Debbie Gibson is the sexiest oceanologist in the world, even though she can’t tell a squid from an octopus just by looking. It happens! Sometimes I mean to pick up a book but I pick up a peanut butter sandwich because they are roughly the same size and shape! I enjoyed this movie so much, oh my god. Not to go on too much, but if you enjoy so-bad-its-good at all, you need to see this so hard. It is obviously bad on purpose, so if you’re a purist about that kind of thing, don’t see it, but otherwise, totally totally see it.
Plot: The megashark and the giant octopus of the title are frozen in an ice cap, which melts because of global warming (TOPICAL!), and then they just fight each other all over the oceans of the world because it is what they are made to do by evolution? (TOPICAL?). Debbie Gibson and some other guys who mostly all die have to chase it around in a little submarine and something something. But don’t worry, the world is saved! Oh wait, IS IT? This movie is just fucking fantastic.
Also, you’d think being frozen for a bazillion years, this shark would be hungry for food, right? WRONG! Oh man, don’t you ever get tired of being wrong? He is hungry for STEEL, and I do not think I am spoilering anything by saying he jumps up and bites a descending plane out of the sky (also because I included this clip at the top of the page), and oh, he also EATS A CHUNK OF THE GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE. I mean, that isn’t a spoiler, that’s basically the whole plot. The octopus doesn’t seem to be hungry, maybe because the people who wrote this movie are not totally sure how an octopus eats. So, to conclude this blog post, I basically cannot recommend this movie enough.
Ok, here is the other best part, in case you don’t wanna rent it:
Oh no! We are rolling closer to the end of 2009 and there are still a few records to review for Keep It On The Brownlowe’s “Best Records of 2009″ list!
You know what? I am so sick of the press giving Dead Weather shit! Calling them a gimmick, an unimpressive super-group that is the creation of yet another restless Jack White alter ego. Saying their album sounds like it was rushed and not fully realized. Claiming their lyrics are hastily written without a shred of intelligence.
The sound of Dead Weather’s debut album, Horehound, is so tough if it were a person I doubt the faceless music critics would have the balls to chastise them so adamantly without fearing for their precious typing fingers!
Parts of the accusations hold some truth. Yes, the band formed spontaneously while the Raconteurs and the Kills were on tour together…. and they wrote and recorded an album in a matter of weeks – which at times is as carnal and uncognitive as deciding to take a piss in a back alley as a cop turns the corner, BUT, that is part of the charm of this record! It’s got all of the primal elements that make music exciting! It’s moody, it’s dark, it’s messy, it makes me wanna drink a pint of whiskey to hear and appreciate the beauty in the sound of broken glass…
It’s rock n roll at it’s very best in a day and age when we are told the true spirit of rock n roll is a ghost of the past.
“60 FT TALL”: Starting off with a stark rumble, the opening track of Horehound sounds almost like the band is warming up in the practice studio. Once the groove gets going, the listener’s attention is grabbed and propelled into a hailstorm of blues riffs and mercy begging shrieks from the lips of our femme fatale, Alison Mosshart.
“HANG YOU FROM THE HEAVENS”: Track 2 begins with a heavy drone and Jack Whites pouncing beat making. Alison comes with a voice that seems to point the finger at her culprit saying she doesn’t know how to treat you and wants to take you to the devil. Mid way the song strips down to White’s tribal premonition that will hang you from the heavens.
“I CUT LIKE A BUFFALO”: A cocky jive featuring the band’s first duet between White and Mosshart. But it isn’t some lovey-dovey 70’s showcase type of duet. Instead it is raunchy, choking over itself like a broken record. Apparently, the lyrics “Y’Know I look like a woman / But I Cut Like A Buffalo” comes from an inside joke between the two when Mosshart told Jack his vocal range was womanly. The organ adds a crazed circus feel on occassion whirling around in a maniacal merry-go-round.
“SO FAR FROM YOUR WEAPON”: Alison Mosshart’s persona sort of intimidates me. Once she was an unassuming American teenager from Florida playing in a pop-punk band called Discount. Next thing you know, she is living in London having a music affair channeling the grimey NYC ’67 underground with Jamie Hince in the Kills. Now she is the provacative front woman tangoing with the Jack White elite. She has this shit down though – with bullets in her pockets and studs at her heels. Singing with a confident sneer and a rope at her hands, the boys call back the words to her in from their love shock prison.
“TREAT ME LIKE YOUR MOTHER”: The beauty of vinyl records is that it really connects you to the music. Even when you have to turn it over and switch on the needle. Without it, the brilliant punch – the second wind – of “Treat Me Like Your Mother” wouldn’t be fully realized. Maybe I’m looking to far into the lyrical content but let’s say this song explores gender roles men are supposed to play. Mosshart challenges the norm to stand up like a real man and learn to shake hands and treat women like their mother. Meanwhile, White tries to figure it out and make out the manipulation. The song drives on forward with a deep growl. Though in the music video White and Mosshart are shooting each other with machine guns so…
“ROCKING HORSE”: The song starts out with a juicy surf guitar and calming ride cymbal hits and rim shots and then morphs into a shrieking duet between Mosshart and White that sounds like it could make it onto a Quinton Tarantino movie soundtrack.
“NEW PONY”: Swaggering forward and breaking it down in a voodoo boogey this song is one of my favorite of the album. Mosshart’s voice sticks straight through the heart and into the gut.
“BONE HOUSE”: Contrary to Tom Petty’s modest warning, Alison Mosshart chants, “I always get the things I want”. This seems to be true. From little beginnings, this lady came up from the South, dabbled in UK fame and now has returned to her homeland to work with – and become – an American superstar. Watch:
“3 BIRDS”: Blown out with reverb and taking notes from cult films about psychedelic surf zombies, this song provides a definite head change from the previous tracks. Ends with a sinister wail that may have it end up on the halloween holiday channel on muzak in 5 years.
“NO HASSLE NIGHT”: Hi Hat crashes in and then falls apart into a cesspool of feedback and rumble. The group gets it back together in this snarky jam.
“WILL THERE BE ENOUGH WATER”: This sleepy, Southern-gothic charm is a fantastic way to end the record. While the lyrical content may pine for the cliche line, “waiting for my ship to sail in”, the Dead Weather wonder if enough water will be there to keep them afloat. Something we all probably wonder about from time to time. This song feels like paddling through the swampy landscapes of the deep south with the threat of serpents swimming underneath the dark waters.
Yes…I think it is certain the album will be battling for the top 3 records of 2009 slot (currently in limbo with Yeah Yeah Yeahs “It’s Blitz”, Bat For Lashes “Two Suns” and The Dodos “Time To Die”).
MORE OF KEEP IT ON THE BROWNLOWE’S BEST RECORDS OF 2009:
…Hazel – Blank Florida b/w Motor Sport Daredevils (1994)
I recently found this along with 2 other Hazel 7″s that I had never seen before, and now I think I have everything they released. Hazel is one of my favorite Portland bands of all time. They were a lot more melodic and spunky than most of the Seattle based label-mates on Sub Pop. This 7″ looks like it was basically self-released, I doubt there were more than 1000 of them. Oh, and these tracks were recorded by Donna Dresch, enjoy!
The majority of New York based artist Enid Crow’s photographs contain little more than a tightly cropped self portraits of the artist wearing different costumes and posing. Despite the seemingly simple and repetative nature of her work, Crow has managed to create a body of images that says quite a bit about American culture and politics.
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Jon Miller: What initially drew you to self portrait photography?
Enid Crow: Around 1979, my parents sent me to the Wendy Ward School of Charm. I took classes from when I was eleven until I was about thirteen. In addition to learning things like how to answer the phone and good grooming, part of charm school is learning how to be a fashion model. This involved collecting photographs of good poses from magazines, going to the front of the class, and posing like the model in your photograph. Then we were supposed to get professional black and white photographs taken and start making fashion model portfolios. My mother seemed to think this was either a scam or totally pointless since I had a mouth full of braces and bad skin.
So, I made my own studio in the basement by taping white paper over the wood paneling and photographed myself with my mouth closed, copying poses of the fashion models in Better Homes and Gardens. That was the only magazine my mother subscribed to. When I was a drama student in college and grad school, I started acting as characters in the self-portraits and working with costumes more.
JM: Your early series, “Disasters” features characters on the brink of, well, disaster. Their faces all share a similar look of fear, shock, and disgust. In contrast, your newest series, “Happy Workers”, is nothing but smiles and happy faces. Clearly, these images comment on disaster as well, but on a more subdued and personal level. What are your thoughts on this shift in the way your ideas are presented?
EC: After photographing all the tragedy in Disasters and in the midst of the financial collapse last year, I needed to photograph something to cheer myself up. So I photographed myself as people who still have their jobs. Granted the characters in my photographs don’t have health insurance and their 401(k) plans tanked, but at least they aren’t working in a child factory in China. America really knows how to treat its workers!
Seriously, in my pictures, I try to address social issues like sexism, homophobia, and the exploitation of workers. Often I think a strong way to get a point across about a painful, controversial topic is to use humor. So in that sense, I haven’t shifted too far from Disasters even though my facial expression has changed and I’m now using text beneath the photographs to help tell the story.
JM: I love your “Faggots” series in which you and your real life partner at the time play the roles of queer men, in both graphically sexual moments as well as quieter and even mundane situations. Though you had been doing drag self portraiture as men for some time, this series seems to have developed later and contains the only overt sexual imagery in your catalog. What inspired these images?
EC: When I first came to New York City in 2000, I worked for an attorney who has an extensive photography collection of men loving, taken from the latter part of the 19th century to today. The International Center of Photography featured some photographs from his collection in a show in 2001. My boss would show me new pictures as they were sent to his office and I’d see them scattered around his desk when I delivered papers for him to sign. The subjects ranged from stiff studio portraits of male couples, men sharing beds in rooming houses, to beefcake pictures from 1970s porn magazines. So in my series, I tried to reflect the scope of the images that I saw in his collection.
JM: Queer sexuality in art is almost automatically processed as transgressive and political. What were you trying to say in creating this work?
EC: Faggots is my favorite series. Justin Duerr, my ex-boyfriend who plays my lover in all the pictures, helped meshoot some of the pictures in the Disaster series around 2005 and 2006. Justin is bi and he would get aroused and want to kiss me when I was dressed as a male character for Disasters. We decided scenes of us kissing as men would make interesting photographs themselves so we started our own series together and ended it just before we broke up in 2008 when I decided to grow my hair long.
The photos comment on issues that I care about very deeply—the arbitrariness of gender and homophobia. I don’t think there’s any need for me to get into a long soap box sermon about why those issues matter because this is, after all, Gaycondo. But briefly, being in love with someone who loves men, and knowing he could engage in certain social rites with me because I am a woman (like marry me or display my photo at work) but not a man he might fall in love with after me, is in my mind, one of the greatest social tragedies there is.
JM: Any future projects currently being fleshed out?
EC: I am going to my parents’ condo in Florida in a week for a vacation. I am going to finish the Happy Workers series and start shooting a very short self-portrait series called Beauty Queens in tiaras and heavy makeup on the beach. In December, I am going to start shooting a series of portraits of vegans in New York City. I would also like to do a serious series of pigeon photographs. I love pigeons and I take a lot of snapshots of the cute ones I see on the street and the sick ones who I take care of in my apartment.
JM: Pigeon photographs? That seems like a pretty grand departure from your regular aesthetic! What type of images are you planning on creating?
EC: I am as fanatical about pigeons as Nikola Tesla, and these pictures will be like poems in their honor. I will take photographs of ordinary street pigeons loafing and flying and manipulate the images so that they are monochromatic and simple. Then I will take the individual, simplified versions of pigeons and use them as individual design elements, like the way the artist Tae Won Yu manipulates letters of the alphabet to make fancy designs. I have been doing this a little with pictures of pigeons I’ve found on the Internet, but I think the pictures will be better if I start from scratch with my own pictures.
But I am not moving away from self-portraits. Sometimes I just need a break to come up with a new idea. As I age, my face is getting saggier and more comic, so I think that the photos will probably get funnier and sadder.
I love love love that I have so many very talented people in my life. My good friends Andy, Taylor, and Matthew are the creators of the internet’s newest viral darling, Sylivia, 11 minutes of pure queer/jewish/geriatric comedic genius*.
*with just a touch of creepy/awkward Miranda July-esque style via Matthew’s off camera interviewer.
I was very lucky to find this gem from the Last Splash era. The title track is my favorite, sounding a lot punchier and punk influenced than is typical for the band. Shocker in Gloomtown is a Guided By Voices cover for which they made an awesome video. I featured it a while back on Music Video Monday… check it out.
All these songs are short and sweet. This is the Breeders at their funnest, and definately one of my favorite things they’ve released. Hope you enjoy!
Target Women, which used to be my favorite online video series, has been sort of *meh* recently. It seemed like show host Sarah Haskins was running out of ideas. If the newest episode, which tears Broadview Security a new one, is any indicator Haskins may still have a few gems left for us. Fingers crossed!
So, I know it’s kind of 90’s and juvenile of me (like saying Catcher in the Rye is your favorite book), but Douglas Coupland* is my favorite fiction author of all time. I just found out that he has a new book conveniently coming out in in time for Christmas. I want to read it immediately, but since I am having a hard time thinking of things I actually want/need for presents this year, I’m trying really hard to not buy myself these things once they occur to me… So, no copy of Generation A for me till December 25th.
From what I can gather, the book takes place in the near future when all the bees have died (you’ve heard about how that’s happening, right?). A few young people become famous when they are stung by miracle bees that somehow survived the extinction. I’m a little confused by the next plot point, but apparently they are then rounded up by the government and brought to a secret island and forced to tell stories or something. I’m sure it will make sense in that absurd Coupland-esque way.
For now, I’m just enjoying some of the teaser video’s on youtube that his publisher has put up. I especially like the following one where Coupland is locked in a room and forced to answer questions from an unseen robot lady. There are unfortunately these stupid fake commercials scattered throughout the interview which I recommend just ignoring….
*never heard of him? I immediately order you to go out and read the following four books:
Before our big gay cruise last month Paul and I spent a day in L.A., basically just driving around and visiting stores. We didn’t buy much (besides a bunch of records at Amoeba) but we did get to indulge in mind numbing fantasy shopping at some of our favorite clothing stores. Before we left Portland, I made a list of the stores at which said fantasy shopping would occur (*SIDENOTE*: I’m the type of person who obsessively makes lists and itineraries whenever I travel. I like my fun planned out in advance. Paul on the other hand prefers to just piss into the wind on vacation. This is a constant point of contention when we travel, but since Paul is the one who does the driving, he tends to win that particular argument by default. *END SIDENOTE*), and of course boutique Opening Ceremony held the number one spot.
I’ve wanted to visit since they opened their first location in NYC in 2002. Incidentally, that was about the same time that Paul and I moved away from the East coast. It took 5 years for Opening Ceremony to follow us to the West Coast, and then another two years for me to actually have an excuse to visit L.A. (which I hate and, in case you didn’t know, is the worst place. ever.)
When we got to the address, we were immediately confused by the building. It is HUGE, and has like 14 doors, none of which are labeled, and only two of which actually open. At one point we ended up standing in the area where they keep the dumpsters and a coffee can for employee cigarettes, furiously shaking a metal gate that led into an alleyway that maybe went to what might have been the entrance or at least the emergency fire escape?
Much like a good fantasy novel, the hero must complete a quest to claim their prize. They must travel great distances into ravaged enemy territory (*ahem, cough, L.A.*), facing successive challenges and making hard choices. We might not have been saving middle-earth, but our prize couldn’t have been more precious:
Awesome shoes.
Here are three of my favorites. If any Gaycondo readers are secret millionaires and feel like buying me a $350 present, the Opening Ceremony website would be a good place to start.
Dixie Longate is an off-broadway solo-act performer and Tupperware sales lady. Her show, “Dixie’s Tupperware Party” has earned her the title of “America’s #1 Tupperware Sales person”.
Currently, the Alabama born Dixie has taken her show on the road, creating Tupperware converts across the country. Her routine, a mixture of humorous, brass, endearing and informational performance, makes anyone in Dixie’s path fall in love with her and (even more importantly) her product.
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Jon Miller: There are so many products that are sold at “door to door” style parties similar to your own. Some, such as sex toys and make-up, seem like a more obvious choice for a salesperson as brassy and fabulous as yourself. What made you gravitate towards Tupperware?
Dixie Longate: Well, my parole officer was the one who got me started in Tupperware. I guess I was always pretty good at sales looking back. I mean the amount of times I would leave the trailer in the morning to go to school with empty pockets and by lunch time, end up with enough Lincoln’s to buy half of the cafeteria a pint of 2% milk, well, lets just say, it made this 4th grader pretty proud. My parole officer told me when I got released that I needed a job in order to get my kids back. Seeing how the restraining order prevented me even going into certain parts of town after 6pm, I told her that it was just a ridiculous idea. Well, she worked her magic as only a lesbian in the police force can do, and Shazaam, I started selling these fantastic bowls.
When I did my first party, I was terrible. I would pick up a bowl and call it a spoon! I was knocking everything over. I have to admit, I was just plain nervous. Not the nerves you get on a first date when you have seen his dirty pictures on the internet and you are just biding time till you get to hop in the back seat and verify that it was a real picture in his profile. Not that kind of nervous. I mean truly nervous.
I hadn’t sold anything for ages.
But when the host of the party brought me out a cocktail and didn’t charge me for it and then people started buying things and giving me money, I felt a little shiver come crawling up my spine. I couldn’t imagine actually getting paid to drink for free. Right then and there, I knew I had found the job for me.
JM: You must be the most radical thing to happen to the Tupperware brand since it’s inception. How did you successfully pitch the idea for your show to the Tupperware corporation?
DL: You have to keep in mind that although the creation of the products was all from the mind of Earl Tupper, it took a woman named Brownie Wise to actual take the products off of the shelves and create the Tupperware Party. She was a revolutionary business woman back in the day. She was the one who figured out that in order to sell brand new, space age, non-breakable bowls, with an air-tight seal to women in the kitchen, she had to actually bring them into the kitchen. Back then, that was a very radical idea. I mean, selling products door to door was nothing new, but to bring women together and get them in a buying frenzy in the middle of their own living room, well, that was truly breaking every sales tradition that was out there. Tupperware has always been a pretty progressive company I think. You really have to be progressive and ever-changing and filled with incredible vision to be able to get a company whose mainstay is plastic bowls to be able to remain success and survive for 65 years. It’s no easy feat. And who hasn’t heard of a Tupperware Party? Everyone knows about it whether you have been to one or not. That is what is so remarkable about the brand.
When I asked them if they would let me keep selling their products and bring them to a whole new group of people that probably forgot that Tupperware even existed, well, I have to give them tons of credit. They approached the idea with lots of integrity and lots of smiles. That is why I still love working for Tupperware all these years later.
JM: In your show, you can sometimes come across as a bit….confrontational. Do people in the audience ever not get the joke?
DL: Sadly, sometimes people sit there and end up all grim-faced and frowny. I don’t understand that. I mean if everyone around is laughing and having a good time, why are you working so hard to be moody? What does that get you in life? I am a woman with 3 kids from the not too good area of Mobile, Alabama. Where I grew up, you had to get good at fighting for what you believe in. I never had much money and it didn’t look like I was going to have all that good of a future. I really struggled for a good long time and I have to tell you, I earned my right to be where I am. So many people who are looking down their nose at me probably didn’t have to lift a finger to get where they are. When they are having a miserable time in life, it gets my back up. I am just here trying to spread some love and uplift some people. I want people to understand that they are in control of their own lives and there is so much more out there for most people than they can ever even dream of. Sometimes, when I come up against someone who is grim-faced, I get a bit stern I guess. It comes from raising three kids on my own. I never want to be mean, but I will tell you, I’m not a push over either. If people are being slugs at the Tupperware Party, and taking away from other people’s enjoyment, well, don’t start crying when I get up in your face and tell you to shape up. It is what we call “tough love” back at home. You might not like it, but it is how you grow.
JM: You are billed as “the #1 Tupperware seller in the US and Canada”. How competitive is the business? Do you have any Tupperware enemies as a result of your success?
DL: Currently, I have slid in sales a bit. I don’t know if it is the economy or that people don’t really get that they can buy Tupperware at the shows, but I am still working everyday to stay on top. After all, that is what a good Christian does. I go to the Jubilee Convention every year and watch as new people get on stage for recognition. It is so amazing to watch people stand onstage and be cheered for and respected like they have never been before in their lives. And they did all of this on their own. This is by virtue of their own work and ingenuity. That, I have to say, earns them respect from me every time. You know the funny thing; the people that I am standing onstage at the top with, they are never jealous or ungracious about success. Last year, when I earned the Top spot, I remember standing onstage with another gal who had worked her tail off all year. Right before they announced me as #1, she turned to me and grabbed my hand and said,”I just have to tell you this. I am so proud of you. Congratulations.” Now THAT is a classy lady. I have a picture of her on my desk where I put in my Tupperware orders. The people who work the hardest are never the ones who give you grief. It is the people who aren’t successful who are always jealous and saying that others are bad because of this, that and the other thing. ”I can’t get anyone to host a party cause Dixie takes them all from me. I can’t sell lots cause I have four kids and I work full-time. It’s not fair that I’m not onstage getting recognized because I worked just as hard.” Shut up you damn whore. Stop making excuses for the lack of your success. Ain’t nobody going to hand it to you. You gotta earn it. Hell, I did. Do you think someone just came up and gave me almost a quarter of a million dollars in sales last year when I was #1? Hell, no. I had to earn every single one of those sales. I did party after party, and sold bowl after bowl. I didn’t make excuses, and I was rewarded for it. That is my advice to people I guess. Stop looking at others as the problem. Take that time that you are bellyaching about something and get off your duff and do something about it. Because you know what is more fun that bitching about what you don’t have? It’s earning the things that you do have. Amen! I’m proud of what I have achieved and you know what, I am proud of every single guy and gal that I stand on stage with at the Jubilee every year, cause I know they have worked every bit as hard as I have. I respect those people. That is who I look to the for advice. You want to do better in life? Get a better group of people to hang out with.
The cream always rises.
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If you live someplace kind of boring (sorry Minneapolis!), then soon you just might get the chance to see Dixie live!
Uh-oh! Only a few more months til the end of 2009 and there are still tons of records to review! Luckily, one of my favorite local Portland duos, Slutty Hearts, squeezed in their debut EP/CD, “Monster”, release on October 30th!
Listen to Slutty Hearts “God Damned Sun”
CDs are in trouble.
The content of the formerly beloved medium has been castrated as it goes through the intangible myriad of technology – the age of digital music players, it’s physical remains inevitably ending up on the floor of a car – a scattered plastic cemetery – or is laid to rest in the lonely depths of one’s closet. Though even as CDs edge towards the music industry apocalypse, independent bands are still hosting CD release parties and using the medium to spread their sonic love. Today, in order for the CD to survive and revive it’s importance in the physical world (and compete against the resurgence of vinyl records), bands must get creative.
Portland based duo, Slutty Hearts, are one of these bands. Armed with a glue stick, a stash of magazine clippings and the skeletons of digi-packs and used plastic cases, Slutty Hearts attempt to resurrect the legacy of the CD – making each artifact radiate with originality…
Slutty Hearts music is equally charming and DIY in nature as they cut and paste the best elements of lo-fi garage rock in their five song debut EP entitled “Monster”. It’s gritty, it’s raw, it’s sexy, it’s a bewitching vamp of simplicity, it’s a modern take on late 60’s garage rock.
“GOD DAMNED SUN” begins with a moody guitar thrust that is reminiscent of both early PJ Harvey and The Kills. Marisa Laurelle’s sweet-sung vox soften the edgy punch of Marty Smith’s ramblings. It sounds like sucking out the venom of an ex lover in a heart break hotel.
“GIMMIE” : Oh how we lust after what we have not! Slutty Hearts explore what they want the very most in this life in this bitchy little tune. Is it really too much to desire a $100 scotch or have a fabulous ass? (Disclaimer: Probably not the best song to play to children who aren’t already feeling entitled as the chorus of “Gimmie More” is quite catchy).
“ARE WE THERE YET” : Quite the comedown from the first songs, this track is a sleepy drive home beginning with a slowly strummed guitar and singer Marisa Laurelle’s slightly sad vocals. This band has a knack for excellent vocal melody. Halfway through the song there is an explosion of sonic mayhem in the form of feedback oozing off of a theramin – a reverent salut to bands from the 90’s who missed the underground cool of the 60’s.
“EVEN THE STARS”: As Marisa Laurelle croons, “even the sun prefers the night” I look out my window and declare this the perfect song for this town as Portland starts to dim at 11:27AM. The world seems to die every second as we edge closer to darkness. There’s talk of parties and discos in the sky. Almost country in it’s tone, I thought I heard the spirit of Johnny Cash whispering towards the end, “even sometimes the stars go out”.
“MONSTER”: The hearts bring back the beat with the final track of this excellent debut. Sweet as spiked soda-pop the song has an undercurrent of nostalgia for young romance and simpler times: like falling in love in front of a car stereo. “Monster” is poppy, upbeat and an uplifting way to end a record.
MORE OF KEEP IT ON THE BROWNLOWE’S BEST RECORDS OF 2009:
So we hope you enjoyed our last txt msg rvw of Whip It! In theory, we would keep doing it for all the movies we see… But we don’t actually go out to that many movies. Instead we present you with a txt msg rvw of a recent Dan Savage article from the Stranger (Seattle’s alt-weekly), Happy Heteroween. Basically, Dan postulates that halloween has become the straight equivalent of gay pride, a night where straights folks can get wasted and flaunt their sexuality as much as they like and hopefully get laid! Oh, and everyone that bemoans sexy halloween costumes is kind of a party pooper that hates sex.
*Special note: we both really love Dan Savage! We also love discourse and feminism, hence this critical review.
Nickey: So, dude, tell me your thoughts on Heteroween! Legitimate expression of sexuality, or just another way to oppress the ladyfolk?
Gaby: It’s like the spice girls- could be a platform for liberation, but ends up being a gross capitalist baby t party.
Gaby: Like I rarely feel like girls are actually expressing themselves. I always want dan savage to be right and I get so sad when he is wrong.
Nickey: I agree. How is a white girl in a Poke A Hottie costume doing anything good for the world?
Nickey: Like, I guess it’s good if you feel sexually liberated by wearing a stripper outfit one night a year, but a really unfortunate number of costumes are really regressive and offensive. Am I being oversensitive when I say a sexy lawyer woman’s costume just seems to diminish women in the workforce?
Gaby: Aw man I was hoping we would disagree and have a battle of the minds! Everyone knows that is blog ratings gold!
Nickey: Ok well… I mean, I’m all for being sexy! I love mini skirts!
Gaby: I think it’s good if you actually can somehow put it [sexy halloween sexual liberation] to use in your real life, like now you are sexually liberated all the time… hmmm sounds like we should have interviewed more people before this txt conversation.
Nickey: Ha ha.
Gaby: I just want to believe but don’t believe that one night is enough to change someone from object to subject.
Nickey: This what I want out of heteroween: more straight boys in short shorts!
Gaby: Slutty prince eric from the little mermaid? I could get behind that.
Nickey: Agreed!
Gaby: Also i feel like the critique of slutoween is just more of people yelling at girls over the internet.
The "pocahottie" costume. Halloween- a time of year when it's ok to be a racist jerk!
Nickey: Dan Savage seems to have this overly rosey view of what it means to be involved with straight culture. Like somehow halloween when straight folks get to objectify each other, but it’s still mostly men objectifying women. Hence why I want more boys in short shorts.
Gaby: Well it’s still only about acting out fantasies of the dominant culture. Oh dan!
Gaby: This convo could be more nuanced if i was not eating tostitos with my left hand.
Nickey: So is there any way to be pro AND anti slutoween? Can I hate the concept but still be fine with girls trying to be sexy and get laid?
Gaby: I think so. Like when you jerk it to porn that is made for like a sensitive frat boy.
Nickey. Ha.
Nickey: You’d think dan, of all people, would recognize when something doesn’t leave room lots of kinds od sexuality. Halloween is not GGG*!
Nickey: Heteroween just wants you to give it a blowjob before passing out!
Gaby: ha ha yes.
*GGG= Good, Giving, and Game. It’s an acronym Dan made up to represent what an ideal sexual partner should be.
Early this morning our friend and producer Kipp Crawford was killed when struck by two drunk drivers while riding his bicycle. He was an amazing person, with a strong sense of self and an artistic dedication greater than any other musician we know. We are thankful for the time and energy he put into our band, and know that our previous and upcoming album would not be the same with out his insight ,intelligence, and creativity.
Slutty Hearts music is equally charming and DIY in nature as they cut and paste the best elements of lo-fi garage rock in their five song debut EP entitled “Monster”. It’s gritty, it’s raw, it’s sexy, it’s a bewitching vamp of simplicity, it’s a modern take on late 60’s garage rock.
