Archive for May, 2008

31
May
08

Paul: Scott McClellan might be a little gay…

…another right wing closet case?

Speculations about McClellan’s sexual orientation aren’t new, but I think they are interesting in the context of his new White House expose. McClellan’s mom has been active in Texas politics for decades and was the governor of Austin from 1977-1983. Back in Bush’s days as governor McClellan was reportedly a regular at Austin gay bars. There are also rumors that he had a “special relationship” with phony White House reporter/male escort Jeff Gannon. What’s with all these right-wing fags surfacing during Bush’s presidency?

Still, the fact that McClellan has come out with this book is somewhat commendable, it suggests that he has some sort of self awareness/conscience. It is definately too little, too late, though. As Press Secretary during the 2004 election he had a pretty tough job, which required him to lie left and right. If I remember correctly he was a pretty shitty liar, he always looked so uncomfortable! He was obviously cognizant of the war agenda he writes about in his book, and he could have done something about it then. He finally resigned three years into the job but waited until now to air his grievances

As far as the gay thing, I don’t really know. Back in his college days he was a fraternity douche. I bet he has a few tendencies but you can’t really call him gay. I think he’s just a “straight” guy who just really likes to suck come cock every now and then.

29
May
08

Paul: Mackenzie Rosman (7th Heaven) is totally gay!

…I wonder what her TV mother would say?

I used to marginally enjoy watching 7th Heaven, but I always thought that Jessica Biel was the most likely to turn out gay. Mackenzie Rosman played the spunky little curly-haired girl Ruthie. She’s 19 now and has blossomed into a hot piece of lesbian ass. I was clued into this a while back via Amanda-Faye’s blog, she’s like my go-to girl for all the Hollywood lesbian dirt. Recently photos have surfaced on the internet of her sucking face with another girl. I’m not going to post them here but if you must see them click here.

here’s a clip of some of the disgustingly wholesome garbage she portrayed for 10 years.

 

 

27
May
08

Paul: Before You Say Anything Bad About Kirsten Dunst, Watch This Video…

…the sordid side a child star’s life.

Kirsten Dunst recently checked into a rehab facility for depression. I didn’t know that you could actually do that, but depression is definately a very serious issue and if you have the means to take a couple of weeks to relax and work on it I suppose you should do so. This video explains a lot about why she might have some issues. Her parents are totally fucking psycho.

In this home video she’s about 13 or so and they are trying to prep her for some sort of interview. Just watch it, the footage speaks for itself. My favorite part is when they ask her how it was working with Tom Cruise and she says she thought he was kind of wierd. Not only did her parents work a number on her, but mega-hottie Jake Gyllenhaal dumped her ass for goodie-two-shoes Reese Witherspoon. That would depress the hell out of me, too.

It makes me sad that people are making fun of her, I hope she gets well soon and goes back to work. She’s mostly been in pretty solid films, no one plays crazy quite like she does. Check out this f-ed up scene from Interview With The Vampire:


 

27
May
08

Jon: The truth about hidden dinosaurs, crop circles, Fonzy, and Jesus….

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…find out NOW on Gaycondo!!

I’ve done this a few times before, but for those of you newer to the blog here is the scoop:

WordPress, the fabulous company that hosts Gaycondo, shares with us a lot of interesting data about who is reading our blog. One of my favorite pieces of info they give us is a list of the most common search terms people use everyday in order to find out blog. You would think that they would be pretty straight forward. They are not.

Today we had some pretty fantastic searches pop up. Here is a screen capture:

 

 

26
May
08

Jon: Immortalize your furry friend…

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Queer Portland artist and power-zinester Nicole Georges has been publishing her awesome narrative illustration zine Invincible Summer for quite a while now, but did you know that she also creates one of a kind pet portraits for a totally reasonable price? I think she catches something really special with her slightly off center depiction of out four legged friends….

26
May
08

Paul: Music Video Monday

L7 – Pretend We’re Dead


 

25
May
08

Paul: I Wish I Thought of This First…

…WANTS FOR SALE

A New York artist couple have started a website called Wants For Sale that is fucking genius. Here’s how it works: 

                                         1. Think of something you want.

                                         2. Make an amateurish painting of it.

                                         3. Sell it on the internet for the price of the real thing.

                                         4. Use the money to buy said thing.

So far they’ve gotten an i-phne, gym memberships, fancy restaurant dinners, and a Nintendo Wii. People are so fucking stupid that they actually fall for it! The couple throws in stuff like a slice of pizza to make it seem like they’re not just being completely greedy, since the cost of materials is clearly higher than the cost of something like that. Perhaps there is some useful message here about consumer culture and materialism, but if you’re enough of a sucker to buy one you probably don’t get it. They’re stupid paintings that probably take about 10 minutes to do. Below is my favorite:

25
May
08

Paul: Please, Please Let it be True!

…has Lindsay Lohan gone gay???

In case you’ve missed it, Lindsay Lohan has been spotted all over the place with gold-star gay DJ Samantha Ronson. Either we’re all being played like a cheap fiddle or there is some truth to the rumors that they’ve been getting nasty together. The pair insist they are just friends, but I’m not so sure. If you take a look at Lindsay back in her Disney days I think there are plenty of signs that she’s got a little bit of gay in her. Ronson seems like a total Shane, I can definately see her working some voodoo on seemingly straight girls.

The real shocker is that they were both seen the other day with conspicuous rings causing people to go beserk that they might be getting married. Now that the marriage ban was struck down in California they can do that now. For some reason domestic partnership or civil unions don’t seem quite as romantic, so I don’t think there’s much incentive for Hollywood homos to get one on the fly a la Britney Spears in Vegas, but all bets are off now.

Part of me thinks they’re just fucking with us, and it’s not like I want Lindsay Lohan to become the face of bi women. Either way, the entertainment value of all this has got to be worth something right? Please, please let there be a sex tape!   

 

25
May
08

Jon: Word of the Week: Obscene…

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I was just reading the current issue of Art in America, my new favorite magazine. One of the articles in it is about a book called “Secret Museums” which is a study of the history of pornography in the art world. In the article, they explain the root of the word obscene. It turns out it is a word with it’s roots in a saying created by the ancient Greeks. Ob Skena was said to describe acts so taboo and awful, that when they occurred in a play they had to take place off stage. In fact, in English the saying literally translates as offstage. Such acts included murder and sex. If you say ob skena out loud, it is easy to hear where the modern day word obscene came from….

Ta Da! Now you know something fun!

24
May
08

Jon: Self portrait photographer Arno Rafael Minkkinen shows some skin…

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…”some” being the operative word.

Throughout the 70′s and early 80′s, photographer Arno Rafael Minkkinen created a body of work (no pun intended) in which he explored the idea of the inherent naturalness of the human form. While this is not a revolutionary idea, it is Minkkinen’s execution that seperates him from other artists working with similiar concepts in mind. In each self portrait, Minkkinen isolates parts of his body in such a way as to make them seem foreign. Upon first viewing, the body in question frequently appears either severed, unrecognizeable as part of a human whole, or existing in the world seemingly through supernatural intervention.  Minkkinen is quick to point out in his artist’s statement that none of the images have been manipulated through digital or mechanical means. Everything you see is as the camera saw it in the natural world.

By seperating the human body from it’s normal social connotations Minkkinen is able to, without undo emotional reference, make a precise (almost medical) argument for it’s naturalness. This turn of logic is quite unexpected in viewing the pieces. It is easy to at first assume that by removing the human form from it’s natural genetic place in the world that the viewer would become alienated from it. In reality, it is rather the opposite that occurs. By changing it context, the spectator is able to finally see that the normative way in which they have always viewed the body has been shaded by cultural contextualization. By instead showing us the whole for it’s parts, Minkkinen has made is possible for us to view the  human form as what it truly is: magnificent and mundane.

24
May
08

Jon: This book has 800 pages, this book has 800 pages, this book has 800 freaking pages…

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…let’s read it!

A group of local Portland nerds teens made this endearing lofi remake of that Shoes video we have all seen 1000 times. In true Portland spirit though, they have ousted the extreme consumuption based themes of the original film. In its place, they promote the first form of free information/knowledge sharing (no, not wordpress…) Public Libraries. Of course, these aren’t your everyday variety teens (otherwise instead of being creative and awesome they would be watching The Hills and/or at the mall shoplifting and calling me a fag), they are members of the Northwest Teen Council of the Multnomah County Library, AKA super nerds.

Just watch:

via Imposed Blog

PS:

To the teen filmakers who will surely find this blog post using there keen nerd abilities:

I too was a super nerd in High School, and grew up to be a smart, creative, and empathetic person, as do most super nerds (aspergers aside). So super nerd teens of Portland, don’t think I’m a jerk!

I kid, but I love!

23
May
08

Jon: It Girl Smash! It Girl Smash Good!

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Beth (sometimes Gaycondo writer) recently reminded me about that mid-nineties PSA starring Rachel Leigh Cook (former “it” girl star of films such as She’s All That) where she smashes stuff in a kitchen to teach you about how bad heroin is. Here, watch:

I remember seeing that commercial when i was about 13 and thinking that it was totally fucking awesome! Yes, yes, yes…. it was an effective PSA that actually did aid in making me not want to do heroin… mission accomplished Ms. Cook.

However, more that that, it made me think about that old Nickelodeon show Finders Keepers. Remember that show? Anyone? Anyone?

23
May
08

Paul: Oprah finds a new way to flaunt her money…

…she’s gone vegan!

 

For the next three weeks Oprah is doing a “21 day cleanse” consisting of a vegan diet. She is also cutting out sugar, gluten, and booze. Of course she has a fancy vegan chef making all of her meals. She even has a blog to talk about her experience. If you’re hungry don’t go to it. It’s basically her talking about all the wonderful food people make for her that you will never be able to afford. I think that with food prices rising it’s time for people to put more time, thought, and energy into what they eat, but this is just absurd. I want her to make her own eggless quiche, dammit. I am so sick of hearing rich assholes whine and obsess about food while so many people in this country eat crap because it’s all they can afford. Poor people don’t need to have Oprah making them feel inferior with her fancy spa diet.

 

21
May
08

SWALLOWS: ATTN: Portland People

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ATTENTION PORTLAND PEOPLE…and those of the greater NW who wouldn’t mind driving to Portland:

Swallows (Jon/Em) would LOVE to invite our loyal gaycondo readers to our big show this weekend. We are playing with some incredible acts including Agent Ribbons, Cat Fancy! and DJ Nate C. There will even be two burlesque performers, Moxie Stunner and Starla Silverstein, doing some sexy dances during a Swallows song and an Agent Ribbons song. Best of all? The next day is Memorial Day, therefore, those of you who have regular, non-service industry jobbi-jobs can stay out late and party!

FEATURING…..

AGENT RIBBONS

This Sacramento duo churns out a sassy and sultry blend of 50s pop, cabaret and even a little Patsy Cline country through a garage rock sound that gets a crowd going. -Ian Schuler, MINI LIFE

LISTEN to “Obituary”:


SWALLOWS

Swallows is one of those cute-as-a-button indie bands with which the Northwest is so abundantly blessed. Describing and labeling a band’s music is like trying to nail Jell-O to a wall, but Swallows is roughly branded as experimental indie-pop with a post-riot grrrl vibe. – Just Out Magazine
LISTEN to “Wait Until Dark” :



CAT FANCY!

Portland local, Cat Fancy!, makes lo-fi feminist space trash channeling British riot grrrl legend, Huggy Bear.
LISTEN to “One Lump Or Two”:



DJ NATE C:

Spinning an eclectic mix of indie, rock, pop, experimental and metal with an emphasis on female artists.

Featuring 2 Burlesque performers doing live choreography!!!:

STARLA SILVERSTEIN:

Ms. Silverstein is fortunate to have her performances choreographed posthumously by the great Agnes DeMille, channeled through a talented local medium. Tonight, she will be doing a live performance while Agent Ribbon plays their lonesome prostitute waltz, “La Noche”.

MOXIE STUNNER:

Fluent in many styles including ballet, jazz, modern, & lyrical, Ms. Stunner will heat up the room with a live dance to Swallows’ queer anthem, “I’d Like To Be Your Man”.

20
May
08

Paul: John McCain is an angry man…

…catchy song!

This reminds me a lot of Kimya Dawson for some reason.

 

20
May
08

Paul: Primary Day…

…is a wonderful day!

I hope I haven’t been posting too much about politics lately, but I have to express my excitement at the way the primary went down this year. Mayoral candidate Sam (Silver Fox) Adams recieved more than 50% of the vote, meaning he will be the next mayor of Portland. Barack Obama is achieving a solid victory over Hillary Clinton, there is no doubt at this point that he will be the nominee. I think that both are great candidates but Obama is the right man for the time for a number of reasons. He is more likely to generate innovative and different solutions to the very serious problems that this country has. Adams is also much more well positioned than his opponent to get things done and make this city a better place than it already is. Obama spoke downtown at the waterfront this weekend and some estimates place the number of attendees at 75,000, this is astounding. I was working and couldn’t make it, but here is a clip of him talking ;about his transportation and energy policy; I can’t imagine something like this coming from Clinton’s mouth. 


 

20
May
08

Paul: The Return Of Free Kitten!

…the first album in 11 years!

I nearly peed in my pants when I heard that Free Kitten was making music again. I just downloaded the new album “Inherit” and it is quite good if a bit unsurprising. Their sound is still intact, full of snarky lyrics and distortion. I’m not a music writer, you can easily find a full review of the album if you want, but as far as I’m concerned Kim Gordon can do no wrong. I’ve always liked the Sonic Youth songs where she sings a lot better. The new Free Kitten album has just the right amount of political angst without being cheesy. If you’re a girl in a band (or like seeing girls in bands) you really owe some gratitute to Kim and the other members of Free Kitten. Just for fun, check out this 1994 video featuring the members of Free Kitten, Kathleen Hannah (wearing a ski mask), Courtney Love, and others to see how things have changed!


Interestingly, the director of this short film went on to make the Britney Spears movie, Crossroads.

20
May
08

KEEP IT ON THE BROWNLOWE: Borderline Obsession…The Kills

Em Brownlowe

THE KILLS AND MY JOURNEY THROUGH THE MIDNIGHT BOOM

For an xx/xy band that is allegedly platonic, The Kills certainly had a romantic formation. Almost a decade ago, Florida native, Alison Mosshart, was on a UK tour with her late 90′s power-pop band, Discount. The night before she was to return to the States, she felt the hotel floorboards shake to the death rattle of Jamie Hince’s guitar. The vibrations lured her downstairs where she would meet the man who would become her musical soul mate. Together they bonded over their similar tastes in art, music and literature. Both of them ditched their typical power punk bands to create something worth living for. Together, they were born again as The Kills. The next day, Alison returned to the States, only to pack up her belongings, and create a eulogy for her past life. Aftering crossing the Atlantic for a third time, she and Jamie moved into a dank, South London flat to live, breathe and create two critically acclaimed garage rock albums, Keep On Your Mean Side (2003) and No Wow (2005).

After a three year hiatus, the Kills challenged themselves to create a hybrid of artpunk-noir that is less reliant on their mutual appreciation of the Velvet Underground and more committed to redefining their own music. The result is Midnight Boom, a polished collection of songs for the night train featuring a brigade of disjointed drum programming, violent guitar grit and provocative vocal melodies. Midnight Boom was conceived in a nocturnal state and encloses us in an after hours affair. In this darkness, The Kills provoke us to trade love for lust, dance as if we don’t notice that our own hearts are raw and bleeding until we wake up feeling ill yet hopeful. Known for their explosive, sexed-up live performances, The Kills are sure to turn you on to their forward-thinking sound of 2008.

Seeing someone you only see on YouTube or in magazines and whose art you completely adore is quite surreal… It’s like a photograph that has come to life and you’re the photographer, capturing memories of what you are apart of. I try not to have expectations but my anticipation suggested the show would be nothing less than incredible…and it was. We were so close…Beth almost got hit in the head with Allison’s microphone. It was also the hottest day of Portland (90+) and everyone was swimming in each other’s perspiration. Despite the heat, the Kills pulled off a rapturous performance catering to their followers whom were uninhibited, unleashing passionate screams and singing along to the music…and dancing! In Portland’s typical “stand-and-nod” mark of approval, the audience’s reaction was quite a success.

WATCH A LIVE VIDEO (KISSY KISSY)

Watch More Live Video…

After the show, I went to check out The Kills’ afterparty at Dunes, where I heard they would be spinning records. I’m always interested in what my favorite artists are into and I had a feeling their music selection would be top shelf. The show was such a vampy energy suck. I didn’t leave the house until 1AM. Luckily, the weather was still warm and the scooter ride across town was reviving. Once I arrived at Dune’s discreet location, I finally realized what “Midnight Boom” was all about… It’s about being nocturnal and getting the party started after everyone else has retired for the evening. The bar’s atmosphere was dense with purple smoke from cigarettes and a smoke machine. Fancy, young hipsters were dancing to some incredible underground vibes I hadn’t heard before. The Kills were spinning records in the back, facing a mirror and dancing as they were filmed. I arrived alone, danced a bit and stood by the bar for the most part, just people watching. I did end up meeting Allison Mosshart at the bar but found myself extremely starstruck and couldn’t really translate the complete admiration and borderline obsession I have for her band into words. In such moments, when all else fails: talk about the weather.





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